Angels

Last night I had a good conversation with Michael. It's been a while because he hasn't been able to talk on the phone for a long time because of his strength holding the phone up and his trach making him cough all the time. His spirits seemed up when he answered. I was having the tough time, not liking being a single mom, so frustrated that the boys were not listening to me. Feeling like an awful everything. We started talking about when he leaves the hospital, etc. Then I started telling him about how there were so many times in this whole awful experience where I felt so much peace. There were also times where I felt people in the room that I couldn't see. I know it sounds strange but when I say people I mean loved ones who have passed on. My mom and my grandma both said to me numerous times that my grandpa, my grandma's first husband who died in a car accident when my mom was really little, was there with us helping us and Michael. I knew that what they were saying was true. I've never had an experience like that but I can tell you right now that in my deepest, darkest moments I knew there was someone comforting me. Michael then said to me in the conversation that he had felt the same exact thing, he said its not that I'm seeing things, its as if someone is there staying by my side. How special is my husband to be able to have that comfort and companionship in order to get through his ordeal. He will never understand or comprehend how special he is and how lucky I am to be his wife. The picture that I put on here is a painting by James Christensen. I love it because it describes the exact feeling I have felt throughout everything. I'm overwhelmed by gratitude to have felt so much comfort in a time where its hard to feel comfort. I see Michael getting better and I'm grateful to finally feel like there is an end to this dark tunnel I have been traveling through.