My worst nightmare week

This past week has been the worst week of my life. I had to face the unspeakable, almost losing someone you love. I have never had to face it. I've seen other people face it, and I always told myself I never wanted to face that.
Before I start I have to give a background about my hubby Michael's health. He has Lupus Nephritis. It is Lupus of your kidneys. He has gone through chemo but has come through in remission and has been a pretty happy, positive person about his health and because of that he rarely gets sick. He also has hypertension, high blood pressure, we have had it under control with meds so we haven't been too worried about it. He also was just recently been diagnosed with gout after he had surgery on his knee to repair his meniscus. Michael is incredibly stubborn and because of that he faces things with faith and optimism. I have always put my faith and trust in that so I never worried too much about his health.
This past Monday the 19th of March I called him while he was at work after our dryer broke. While we were talking he paused and said, "Wait a minute! I just forgot my morning!" " What did I do? I can't remember." At first I thought it was a joke but then quickly realized he was being serious, so I told him what he had done. Then he said, I have an awful headache to and my throat feels really sore. So I made him promise to come home so I can see him. He came home and took his blood pressure and it was 99/50. That is really low so I was a little concerned, so I called his lupus doctor and he advised us to go to the ER because Michael's blood pressure is NEVER that low. So I found people to take the boys and I took him to the ER. They did all kinds of tests because they told us his symptoms were symptoms of a stroke or a heart attack. Every test came back negative, even his blood test did too. They suggested we stay the night and Michael do a stress test in the morning. Michael hates hospitals and wanted to sleep in his own bed and so he refused treatment and we went home. He stopped taking his blood pressure meds from the advisement of his lupus doctor until Michael was able to come in for an appointment with him to see if he needed to change the dosage and that was the end of it.
Wednesday came and it was about 4:30 when I got a call from one of our employees who was on location with Michael in Fort Thomas, Kentucky taking pictures of little dancers. She informed me that the ambulance was coming for Michael because he was pale, sweating and almost passed out. I hurried and got some people for the boys and met Michael there. They did some of the same tests again and they all came back negative again. We were both frustrated with the ER doc this time because he kept saying the same thing, that Michael was having signs of a heart attack and that they wanted to do further testing. The whole time the doc was talking to us I felt confused and frustrated and new that it wasn't a heart attack. Then Michael mentioned his sister had just had a genetic hole in her heart repaired and is also an X-ray tech, maybe its that? So we knew she would have some good insight as to what we needed to do if Michael had the same problem as Tracie. Sure enough after I called her Tracie told us that the same thing happened to her, the symptoms, the tests coming back negative, everything! So she advised me to make Michael stay the night there and have them do the only two specific tests that found the hole in her heart. So I marched into Michael's room and told him that was what we were going to do. He rolled his eyes because remember he hates hospitals. I made him talk to his sister and then he said OK. So my dad and brother in law gave Michael a blessing I ate dinner with him and he said he would call me in the morning after he talked to cardiology.
He called me Thursday morning at 8:30 to tell me that he met with a cardiologist who agreed with the tests because of his sisters genetic hole in her heart, but he wanted to do a CT scan of his heart first. So when I got there he was being wheeled in a wheel chair down the hall to get an echo cardiogram, (an ultrasound of his heart). We stood there and waited while they were preparing the room. I could see they were quite frantic and no one was smiling. The cardiologist came out to me and said, "Your husband doesn't have a hole in his heart, he has an Aortic Dissection, and if we don't get him into emergency open heart surgery right now he will die." I stood there quite stunned not knowing what to say and Michael just looked sick. They did the echo and when the doctor was done making arrangements he motioned me over and drew a picture of a normal aorta and Michael's aorta. He then said, "Michaels aorta is malformed, it is so malformed that the blood is not flowing properly and if its not flowing properly it will coagulate and tear or explode, and he will die just from getting up from the bed to this chair." He then said," Michael's valve is also not working properly either." He then showed me the echo and I about died. How did everyone miss my hubbys problem? They rushed Michael over to a room to give him some meds to keep his blood pressure down. The doctor came over to me and put his arm around me and said, "It is going to be a long day for you, the surgery is worse than open heart surgery because we don't know exactly what this aorta looks like and what we are going to do exactly to fix it." "You will be at the hospital from 8-12 hours, do you have someone to be with you?" He then said." Michael is one lucky man, when people have this malformation we usually don't find out they have it until it is too late."
I went with Michael down to the ambulance kissed him goodbye and listened to the sirens as they were taking my hubby away. I finally lost it in the parking lot. My dad drove up as I lost it and drove me over to St. Elizabeths hospital in Edgewood, Kentucky where we met my mom and we waited 9 hours for my Michael to get out of surgery. When he got out they took us back into a waiting room where the doctor met us and told us, "Michael is one lucky man, when I opened him up his aorta tore. I fixed it and I also put a new valve in called a saint Jude valve. He is losing a lot of blood so he is not out of the woods yet." He then left to go help Michael and I then lost it again. If my sister in law and I wouldn't have made Michael stay the night he would have died the next day, and I wouldn't have known why until they would've done the autopsy.
I have been in a fog since then. Scared for the future, scared about the whole experience. Our boys have been struggling a lot and don't understand the empty feeling they have without their daddy. I'm so grateful for miracles and for strong people like my hubby who do whatever they can to fight for their loved ones. My hubby is doing really well now, slowly making progress. Our love for each other is renewed and my out look on life has completely changed. My hubby is one special man and I am beyond lucky to be married to him. I have been so overwhelmed by all the love people have given to us over the past week. I'm not one to accept help by people very often but I am grateful that my family has encouraged me to let people serve me. I'm slowly coming out of this tragic event, but I think that when he comes home I might have a few triggers that will cause me to remember all the feelings I have had and the images of my hubby being in a coma after the surgery so his heart will heal. I'm grateful for the right doctors and nurses who have been at the right place and the right time to save my hubby. I'm also grateful for the one main person who helped me and my sister in law convince my hubby to stay in the hospital, that man upstairs. Life is short, kiss your loved ones, for I have.